Late last week, China (which already tariffs most key US goods, and bans most American tech companies) announced “retaliatory” tariffs to our own retaliatory tariffs. But more notable than their new 34% speed bump on imported goods is their proposed import curb on rare earth metals — an inadvertently great case for trade war. Just a few decades ago America was the global supplier of REEs. Then Beijing subsidized mining and processing ops to the point nobody else could compete, while a bunch of dumb libs here at home let the EPA regulate domestic processing into extinction. Now we rely on China for most modern infrastructure. Our path is obvious: clip the EPA’s wings, subsidize competitive operations, and tariff back. This won’t help us tomorrow, but we’ll never become independent if we keep taking cues from social media blowhards. China thinks in decades. It’s time for us to do the same.

The NYT reported Thursday that Trump plans to block $510 million in federal funding for Brown University — part of a campaign to punish colleges for “antisemitism.” The left (reasonably) has accused the president of using “discrimination” (a cause he’s so famously passionate about) as a pretext to yoink money away from ideologically hostile institutions like Brown. But whether justified or not, Trump is forcing an overdue, two-part reckoning across the Ivy League. First, how should these universities sustain themselves — should hairdressers in Scranton really be subsidizing Brown kids’ $93,064-per-year education? Second, why are we putting 18-year-olds into debt slavery for credentials that often deliver less opportunity than a laptop, Wi-Fi, and a year of focused trial and error? I can’t solve the Ivy League’s existential crisis, but here's a freebie: lay off some of the assistant deans of assistant deans. Or better yet, let ChatGPT handle their next diversity audit.

Last week, the former head of San Francisco’s Department on the Status of Women filed a lawsuit against the city, shortly after being suspended for spending $600K on extravagant amenities for a one-day conference (for women), giving $85K in city contracts to a “dear friend” in exchange for “coaching” (the friend was a woman), spending another $113K on video promos for their YouTube channel with 13 subscribers (probably women), and illegally earning $20K via her “consulting firm” funded by her own department (the women department). Her lawsuit claims this is all fake news and that the colleague who ratted her out is lying, and while many are skeptical, I believe her. I believe in Kimberly Ellis and I am hereby calling for her immediate reinstatement, because I know, as all straight men do, that California girlies A) hate spending other people's money, and B) never turn on each other. Case closed. #JusticeForKimberlyEllis 

 Look at your team — the magic happens in Slack. Fast comms, eliminating blocks, pushing toward the goal.

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Probably on the front porch waiting for yesterday’s news to hit them in the feet right now.

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