San Francisco’s office vacancy rate just hit an all-time high of 34.5%, ushering in a fresh wave of “doom loop” predictions. “This,” declared the internet groundlings, “is our new Detroit!” But the reason we keep talking about this city is it’s actually, presently important, and so the thought of losing it is scary. Meanwhile, more than 100 people were shot in Chicago over the weekend, 19 of whom were killed, and basically nobody heard about it. In response, the mayor lamented the inherent white supremacy at work (fact check: the shooters were black, the police chief is black, and he – the mayor – is black), then blamed literally Richard Nixon. The city’s population has been steadily declining for decades, and I’m pretty sure the “financial center” keeping it afloat can move basically anywhere. Friends, I agree the doom loop is real, I’m just not sure it’s San Francisco we should be worried about.

Sunday, president of the American Federation of Teachers Randi Weingarten took to social media to show off her photography skills. “Tonite’s [sic] sunset,” read the caption of her horizon snapshot, prompting many commenters to correct the spelling of, yes, the president of America’s second largest teachers union. While the error was indeed troubling, we can at least say Randi humbly admitted her mistake and — oh, wait. Actually, she responded by calling the grammar sleuths “extremists,” posting a cover of the song ‘Tonite’ by the Go-Go’s, and saying “muse about this” with a link to a post on France’s election results (?). Honestly, props to Randi. She may be setting a terrible example for our kids on spelling, but she is teaching them a separate valuable lesson about how to avoid accountability by simply doubling down with nonsense. Oh, did those COVID school closures upset you? Well fuck off, idiot, guess you’ve never heard of ‘Closing Time’ by Semisonic.

New analysis from Quiver Quantitative shows a recent surge in Nancy Pelosi’s stock portfolio has put her net worth at an all-time high of $257 million, following a year of 39.6% returns — double that of Berkshire Hathaway, and outperforming the S&P 500 by 15 points. Where is this woman’s Fortune cover, you’re probably wondering. The answer is 1) sexism (duh), and 2) this looks like crime, which is bad for the center left. Now, the MAGA Pepes and the commies are demanding we dismantle what looks like a fuzzy kind of insider trading. But this would be incredibly stupid. Folks, swallow the partisan bullshit for a second and consider the opportunity here: let the congressmen keep on trading, but also print another cute trilly, roll it into a sovereign wealth fund, and peg it to Pelosi’s investments. If we're gonna grift, let us grift together. 

We’ve all had that one Zoom call where we clicked the link, the software took 5 minutes to update, we joined late, and then Zoom connected to our next door neighbor’s Samsung TV instead of just using the laptop speakers. The alternative would’ve been to just use FaceTime: it works every time, has zero frills, and takes almost no effort. Most payroll systems today are metaphorically Zoom: designed in 2015, bloated, and time consuming. Warp, on the other hand, is how payroll and compliance would work if Apple designed it: compliance is handled automatically, everything is optimized for speed (takes just 10 minutes to set up), and it’s sexy too. Consider moving to a payroll platform that values speed of execution and user experience as much as you do. 

Get started with Warp here.

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techcrunch’s wild spiral into madness reminds us of the stakes, a brief history of “new” media, and notes from pirate wires — what we knew, what we learned along the way, and where we’re going

california relies disproportionately on a tiny handful of ultrawealthy households, which underwrite the state’s massive expenditures. what happens if it taxes them out?

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