Biden challenged Trump to the earliest debate in modern history yesterday, which the media framed as courageous. Of course, the purpose of the challenge was to obscure the fact that his team pulled out of the standard later debates, right before the election, with the hope of mitigating any damage our senile president is about to do to himself on stage. They’ve also demanded no audience, which Trump wants (“for excitement purposes”) and mic cuts (for Trump). And listen, sure, it’s alarming Biden is too frail for a gloves-off fight, but the bigger problem is the very concept of these shit debates. Nobody needs two hours of stupid questions — with commercial breaks! — and minute-long canned responses. These are spectacles, not informative public services, and they’re beneath us all. Truly, what a sad decline from Lincoln-Douglas. Anyway, if the clown show happens, catch me on X. I’ll obviously be live tweeting every second.

American Eagle and Ted Baker, two of the last remaining major retailers at San Francisco’s beleaguered downtown mall, announced they will shut down their stores in the coming weeks. With dwindling foot traffic and little prospect of enticing new retailers to the space, the once-iconic shopping center is almost certainly on its way into the annals of history. Now, a more pressing question: What will we build in its stead? A hollowed out downtown presents a once-in-a-century opportunity to reshape a neighborhood in a tech-forward image. Personally? I’m thinking Art Deco meets chrome — velvet seating, terrazzo flooring, chevrons and sleek wood against a VR arcade, museum of tech, smart playground and the like. But realistically? We’ll probably get a few hundred hours of tortured zoning hearings culminating in (1) new bench, which will promptly become the exclusive property of vagrants.

On Wednesday, a working group of bipartisan senators fronted by Majority Leader Chuck Schumer (D-NY) unveiled a much-anticipated AI roadmap — guidelines for Congress to follow in the years ahead on artificial intelligence that were the product of several meetings with CEOs, researchers, and other stakeholders. The Schumer framework calls for at least $32 billion to be invested in AI innovation, and — somewhat surprisingly for a group led by the dude who once expressed a desire to crack down on Zyn — actually stops short of calling for widespread regulation like many anticipated. But, to any AI doomers out there who find this development troubling, fear not: there's an entire continent out there that loves to regulate important new technologies out of existence. It’s called Europe, and from what I hear they’re letting basically anyone in these days. Bon voyage!

In the aftermath of the 2022 Uvalde, TX school shooting, the Uvalde school district banned one parent, Adam Martinez, from district property for two years. His crime? Questioning the qualifications of a recently hired school district police officer. Not long after, FIRE (the Foundation for Individual Rights and Expression) sent a strongly-worded letter to the district threatening to sue if they did not lift the unconstitutional ban. That’s all it took for the district to lift their ban on Martinez, largely because FIRE has a strong track record of winning the first amendment cases they take on. This is one of countless cases that FIRE takes on to defend the civil liberties that we all enjoy. Consider a donation so they can continue their work.

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