In the cheerful, glowing appearance of a celebrity, amidst a standing ovation from the crowd, Biden’s Head of Industry Terrorism (FTC Chairwoman) Lina Khan arrived at the Daily Show for a conversation with ancient TV clown Jon Stewart. There, over 20 excruciating minutes of mutual masturbation, Khan — a powerful agent of the most powerful government in human history — framed herself as an underdog at existential odds with the Big Bad Tech Industry, which needs to be dismantled. Why? This was never explained. But I did learn our failure to adequately castrate Big Tech is why Boeing jets are falling out of the sky. Then Stewart casually suggested Jeff Bezos still ran Amazon, and Khan moved on to Meta, where her purpose finally became clear: Facebook was failing when Zuck acquired Instagram, she insisted, and that acquisition stopped the company from failing, which is bad. Success, in other words, is anti-competitive. Remember, folks, they aren’t fighting for “safe businesses.” They truly just hate business at the conceptual level.

Yesterday, prediction market startup Kalshi announced financial giant Susquehanna International Group is launching an “event contracts” division to trade on their platform. Kalshi, which allows traders to bet directly on events — say, Tesla’s deliveries this quarter, or the top artist on Spotify this year — has suffered from tiny, illiquid markets that limited trading to hobbyists. But SIG’s entrance on the scene is Kalshi’s Bitcoin ETF moment: Liquidity will increase by over 20x, which will allow users like you and I to YOLO into bets, and bring a cascade of institutional players onto the field. We’re one big step closer to a world where we’re all betting directly on events and people, and not just their fugazi representations in stocks and bonds. Personally, I have a list of haters that I'm just waiting to bet my life savings against.

BART, the Bay Area local transit system famous for feces-covered stations and schizophrenic-filled trains, just announced it’s rolling out a new initiative to combat harassment. More police officers, dare we hope? Or security cameras, at the least? Of course not. This is San Francisco. You’re getting a cute little blue-and-pink card emblazoned with the words “you got me?” and the phone number of the BART police that you can hand to the wide-eyed Filipina grandmother who is sitting quietly next to you as a man with meth-induced psychosis screams obscenities through the carriage.

Crypto memecoin ‘Jeo Boden’ (yup, it's our president but spelled differently) is up over 160,000% over the last month, with a market cap of over $300 million at time of writing. Meaning if you’d have sold four shares of Apple and put it in $BODEN, you’d be a millionaire now. Relevant, because Americans who move to Puerto Rico are eligible for a 100% tax exemption on cap gains (and a bundle of other incentives that have made it a haven for crypto traders and other entrepreneurs). Christie’s International Real Estate Puerto Rico is the top luxury real estate firm on the island by market share, and it’s owned and operated by a US-licensed accountant with 14 years of private equity experience. Which means while they might not approve of your choice in memecoins, they can help find you a great home in PR that comes with significant tax advantages.

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the union has a list of abandoned properties perfect for squatting linked on its website and, through its friends in city government, has spent decades shaping the city's reckless housing policy

yolande beckles’s history of financial scandals in the u.k. and los angeles is easy to find, so why have education policymakers like jo boaler welcomed her in?

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