As major flight disruptions rocked the nation following mass cancellations at Newark Airport, one of Newark’s air traffic controllers bluntly explained the cancellations to the press: “It is not safe. Don’t fly into Newark.” Thank you? And also, holy shit. But why is this happening? And should we be castrating Big Balls for bad FAA DOGE cuts? Seems not. Newark has lost 20% of its air traffic controllers in recent weeks all on its own, with United CEO Scott Kirby claiming they simply “walked off the job,” which seems to have followed malfunctions in radar and radio (what). Now, Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy is begging for hires, offering $5k bonuses while speaking ominously of “cracks in the system.” Which would be terrifying if I wasn’t already doing everything humanly possible to avoid Newark Airport. Stay safe, friends, and remember: that mediocre breakfast in United’s packed lounge will never be worth your life. 

Yesterday, Microsoft users received the following message: “Thank you for being part of Skype.” And then the software was simply… gone. But its memories linger, and after 21 years Skype meant something different for everyone: a voice chat tool for pimply gamers, a secure comms tool for Arab Spring dissidents, an interview platform for millennials becoming foreign English tutors in China, an interview platform for boomers vetting foreign mail-order brides in Thailand, and the preferred messaging app of shady internet marketers shipping boner pills worldwide. Acquired by eBay for $2.6B in 2005, then Microsoft for $8.5B at its peak in 2011, Skype forced telecom giants to rethink their business models. It passed the verb test (“let’s Skype”), it passed the volume test (300M users), but ultimately it failed the pandemic vibe check (dethroned by some shitty Z-word copycat everyone hates with probable backdoors to China). Rest easy, friend — give my love to MSN in heaven.

Governor Glenn Youngkin has left some Virginia Republicans feeling shafted after urging GOP nominee John Reid to exit his lieutenant governor race for allegedly *checks notes* posting gay porn on Tumblr. Youngkin called the issue a “distraction,” meanwhile Reid (who is openly gay) denies owning the Tumblr account, with some of his allies even minimizing the controversy altogether — said one anonymous Republican operative: “it’s just a bunch of penises.” And I agree, anonymous penis guy. So what if John dropped a few dong pics? Unless Republicans want to go back to losing elections with puritanical squares like Mitt Romney, they should heed their party leader’s eloquent sentiments about gay people from The Apprentice: “I like steak. Somebody else likes spaghetti. That’s why they have menus in restaurants.” Wise words. Besides, good luck purging all GOP candidates with questionable internet histories. Yes, “lifelong bachelor” Lindsay Graham, I’m looking at you.

exclusive scoop: a group of bipartisan lawmakers are urging an investigation into unitree, a chinese-based robotics firm that’s currently allowed to operate at american prisons and even military sites. unitree robots have built in backdoor access tied to ccp servers… and are reportedly being developed for military purposes. read ashley’s write-up for the full damning details

at $2.5 billion per mile, the first phase of nyc’s second ave subway has become the most expensive, least efficient subway project in world history. it’s part of a new pattern in america: consultants and bureaucrats lighting taxpayer money on fire while treating public infrastructure like a never-ending jobs program. brian nuckols explains how we got here — and how we can build again

rap used to be thrilling — now it’s fake, corporate, and boring. but a group of x-rated gay artists are returning rap to its politically incorrect roots... and amassing millions of (mostly straight) fans in the process. read alex petrov’s account of falling into the aggressively gay, highly-online world of “sus rap”

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